You know , love is a strange thing. There are so many layers to it. So many intricate components. So many varied degrees. There’s this saying , ” Thin line between love and hate”. I’ve always wondered what could make you tip over that alleged thin line. I’ve come to learn that you don’t tip over the line, it just blurs in the sand. It is my belief that hate and love are two very powerful emotions that you can’t have one without at one point having experienced the other. If I’ve never loved you, there is no way possible for me to feel strongly enough to hate you. No way. But I do think it’s possible to love someone and hate them. ( Thats the blurred line I mentioned earlier). For me, I’ve always thought it impossible for me to ever truly hate someone. Until recently. I was in the presence of someone I thought I merely disliked , and I never have experienced the range of emotions that exuded me that day. Rage , fury, balled sweaty fist, all things that encompassed my being. All things hidden by a smile and my signature Quay sunnies. But how did I get here ? I’ve asked myself this several times but I’ve never really given myself a fair answer. I know now. I opened myself up to disrespect , and I never sealed that door. So more pain, hurt and anger has seeped in. Also lies. I think lies are what truly hurt a person like me the most. Why? I’m a person who lives so boldly in my own personal truths, that it baffles me at this point the lengths some will go with their lies. That kind of toxic energy is never ok. Never a good thing. In these past few months I have felt myself become a person I never saw as someone I could be. Vindictive, hurtful, unbothered. These aren’t examples of my character. I’m naturally a warm caring person. But the saying hurt people hurt people has truly rang true.
In knowing this, you have to make a conscious decision to move on, power forward. We can’t grow into better versions of ourselves if we still have roots in our pasts. Forgiveness is a MAJOR KEY. ( If you read that in Dj Khalid’s voice you truly are my people) you have to forgive those who have hurt you, wronged you, betrayed you. Why? A couple reasons. The first , holding on to that hurt gives that person power over your narrative. They control how you view the world. That isn’t fair to you. Second. They now control how you deal with others, how you choose to love, how you choose to grow. Again that’s doing yourself a diservice.
” who knew from a concrete a flower would grow” this quote never made sense to me until recently. For me the concrete represents a hard , dark time that you never see yourself breaking free from. The flower represents the results of you just letting a little bit of light in. ( That felt like a sermon 🙌🏿) How corny would I be to end this post with ” Love & Light – C” ? Well I kinda just did anyway lol. Until next time. ✌🏿
P.S here’s what I was bumping.